kjp

So what is "normal" family life? Who knows - certainly not me. But is there such thing as a normal family. The all have issues, problems, differences. Anyhow.

It seems that things here are going back to normal (somewhat, but not really �" only superficially). We've (mum and the 'kids' - and the bub) having been having meals in the family room around the table - as opposed to meals of the past few weeks around Dad's bed - helping him eat. Now there's not much point to eating with him. He's breathing, and that's all he’s doing - no response to anything since yesterday morning's cuddle session with the bub.

I think that I should buy a lottery ticket:

You don't ever think that a family member will ever get something like this, but someone (well, a decent sized handful) in the world will. You don't ever think that you'll win lotto, but someone in the world will. If random bad things can happen, then surely random good things can happen?

If you've got a pessimistic outlook, then it'd be easy to think that that is not the case for you - that a bad thing may happen to you, no good things will ever happen to you.
If you've got an optimistic outlook, then it'd be easy to think that that is the case for you - that no bad things will happen to you, but a good thing may/will happen to you.

I always thought that neither would happen to me - no major good or bad things would happen to me. Maybe naivety? Or just sitting-on-the-fence? Or just the statistics: what is the proportion of people that don't have a family member with a terminal condition and who don’t win lottery �" 99.99% ?

I don't think that I'll ever get it - I have to just accept that one of those random things in life did happen to my family. In this case, the random thing that happened was a bad thing.

I don't know.

Sadness, and concern and bit of disappointment. Not confusion, not anger.

I analyse it all to understand it to protect myself from hurt. ????

OK, other things now:
There's a slight chance that I'll be in Brisbane tomorrow night -- for one night only (less than 24 hours in total). I couldn't stay away for more than that. But I'd be going for something that I really enjoy - a good escape from all this mess down here. Don't know - will need to decide early on tomorrow morning. I'd hate it if J died if / when I was away from here. Although, at least I'll be able to bring some warm clothes back: I packed in a rush and kind of forgot that stuff... not a good idea for Canberra in March.

It’s interesting, I’ve just re-read bits of the above. A ‘bad thing’ in terms of someone’s health maybe a terminal condition. But what is a ‘good thing’ in terms of health. Just being healthy enough to be able to do whatever it is that you want is ‘good’? Don’t know. The example of a random good thing was a financial lottery win, but this is narrow. What other random things that don’t happen to most people can happen which are good? Hmmm.